USING VISUAL AIDS
USING VISUAL AIDS
The
Importance of Having the Right Attitude in Life
Our attitude is
what influences all our actions. It is only the right attitude, which gets us
good results. All the smiles and hand-shakes are not going to get you far,
if you do not have the attitude to help
others, without any selfish expectations in return. If you expect something in
return, then it is not help, it is only a favor, and you are only interested
in your own selfish desires.
It has been said
that Opportunity ‘knocks’ at every door. If we utilize it, it leads to success.
Otherwise, we just complain about the ‘noise’. Every problem that we face is
nothing but an opportunity, to success, by learning how to conquer it. The
better we get at problem solving, the more successful we are.
Theory is only
fully understood by solving problems. One cannot succeed in life with mere
theories; it is only the application of theory, in overcoming problems, that
brings the desired results.
To a ‘positive’
person, a problem is not only a temporary set-back, but also a stepping stone
to success. To a ‘negative’ thinker, every problem only confirms his
pessimistic view, that whatever can go wrong, will go wrong. So every problem
becomes a stumbling block, with the inevitable result, that he/she soon stops
progressing. Human nature has inertia, i.e. it resists any change. We like to
keep within our ‘comfort zone’, even to the extent of not trying to change a
bad habit, that we are only too well aware of. However, should one desire to
improve, there is o stopping you, on your path to success.
Some
common Do’s and Don’ts :
Accept
Responsibilities. Whether in your job or elsewhere, avoid ‘Passing the Buck’.
By accepting any responsibility, you are actually promoting yourself. Accept
responsibility, even for something you have done wrong, and try to analyse and
rectify it, instead of trying to shrug off the blame. Avoid statements like
‘This place is hopeless’ or ‘This is not my fault’.
Create the Right
Attitude. Everyone in your team must benefit, so that the whole group gains.
Everyone stands to gain, as you reap more benefits from the combined efforts,
than from just trying to be a ‘loner’. This is called as having a Team Spirit.
Many people have a Win – Lose attitude. They feel that it is right to gain
something extra, even at the expense of everyone else in their group, who must
‘lose’. This leads to a Lose – Lose situation, where everyone in the team ends
up with some loss.
Have consideration
for the other person, and you will receive the same consideration, from others,
in return. Give others the same
treatment, that you would like to receive from them. Be tactful. Avoid
unnecessarily hurting any person’s sentiments, by undue harshness. Some people
brag about being ‘brutally honest’. They take more pleasure in the brutality,
than in the honesty. You can be sure, that the recipient of your ‘brutality’
will leave no stone unturned, in returning you the same treatment (with
interest).
Avoid criticism,
especially in public. It is very easy to criticise, but difficult to undo the
damage due to negative criticism. Negative criticism almost always has the
effect of making the person justify his wrong action, rather than to remedy the
situation. Make the person aware of his draw-backs indirectly, so that he will
himself ‘correct’ the fault. Correcting a fault is the desired outcome; not
‘hanging’ the person for his alleged ‘crime’. Although a person doing a ‘wrong’
action needs to be corrected, it is the action that is ‘wrong’, not the person.
Be positive in
your interpretation of another person’s actions. Don’t get paranoid and expect
the worst. It is always better to give a person the benefit of the doubt. Even
in a court of law, nobody is declared a criminal until proved. Unfounded
suspicions are worse than hanging a person.
Be an Empathic
listener. Seek to understand, what the other person is trying to communicate,
with an open mind. Do not try to dominate his talk, or judge him with your own
myopic or prejudiced views of the situation.
Be enthusiastic in
whatever you do. Enthusiasm is ‘infectious’ i.e. it fires up the whole team to
perform better. The only difference between the successful team and any other
team, is that little bit of extra effort, which is possible only if there is an
enthusiastic approach.
Give honest and
sincere appreciation, whenever a person deserves this. This is not to be
confused with flattery, which shows up the lack of character of the Flatterer.
A Flatterer almost always has an ulterior motive behind his flattery, which is
usually only to his own benefit. However, other things being equal, it is far
better to suffer a Flatterer, than to be stuck with an ungrateful person, who
does not ever appreciate anything, much less ever praise anyone. An ungrateful
person displays a total lack of any leadership qualities.
The moment someone
points out any of your mistakes, it is better to accept it graciously, instead
of launching your own diversionary
tactics to shift the blame elsewhere, or deny something totally. However, you
must take care not to repeat the same mistake again. To make a mistake once is
human; to repeat it many times, is sheer carelessness and not pardonable.
Accept the mistakes of another, without
humiliating him publicly, and rejoice in the success of his efforts to correct
it. Congratulate the person when he corrects the mistake, with the same
constancy, as when you pointed out his mistake. You must always be fair in your
dealings.
Don’t get
unnecessarily involved in Arguments. They achieve nothing. Neither side knows
the facts. If they did, why would they argue ? Nor are the arguers interested
in knowing any facts. To an Arguer, who is right is more important, than what
is right. An argument is an emotional affair. When viewed logically, it is a
complete waste of time, as there are no tangible benefits. Neither side is open
to the point of view of the other. There is nothing to be learnt from it
either, as neither side is working systematically. The only way to get the best
out of an argument is to avoid it, or decline to participate. Arguments leave
you frustrated and emotionally charged, without achieving any objective, of
putting up your point-of-view.
Accept
Responsibilities. Whether in your job or elsewhere, avoid ‘Passing the Buck’.
By accepting any responsibility, you are actually promoting yourself. Accept
responsibility, even for something you have done wrong, and try to analyze and
rectify it, instead of trying to shrug off the blame. Avoid statements like
‘This place is hopeless’ or ‘This is not my fault’.
Create the Right
Attitude. Everyone in your team must benefit, so that the whole group gains.
Everyone stands to gain, as you reap more benefits from the combined efforts,
than from just trying to be a ‘loner’. This is called as having a Team Spirit.
Many people have a Win – Lose attitude. They feel that it is right to gain something
extra, even at the expense of everyone else in their group, who must ‘lose’.
This leads to a Lose – Lose situation, where everyone in the team ends up with
some loss.
Have consideration
for the other person, and you will receive the same consideration, from others,
in return. Give others the same
treatment, that you would like to receive from them. Be tactful. Avoid
unnecessarily hurting any person’s sentiments, by undue harshness. Some people
brag about being ‘brutally honest’. They take more pleasure in the brutality,
than in the honesty. You can be sure, that the recipient of your ‘brutality’
will leave no stone unturned, in returning you the same treatment (with
interest).
Avoid
criticism, especially in public. It is very easy
to criticize, but difficult to undo the damage due to negative criticism.
Negative criticism almost always has the effect of making the person justify
his wrong action, rather than to remedy the situation. Make the person aware of
his draw-backs indirectly, so that he will himself ‘correct’ the fault.
Correcting a fault is the desired outcome; not ‘hanging’ the person for his
alleged ‘crime’. Although a person doing a ‘wrong’ action needs to be
corrected, it is the action that is ‘wrong’, not the person.
Be positive in
your interpretation of another person’s actions. Don’t get paranoid and expect
the worst. It is always better to give a person the benefit of the doubt. Even
in a court of law, nobody is declared a criminal until proved. Unfounded
suspicions are worse than hanging a person.
Be an Empathic
listener. Seek to understand, what the other person is trying to communicate,
with an open mind. Do not try to dominate his talk, or judge him with your own
myopic or prejudiced views of the situation.
Be enthusiastic in
whatever you do. Enthusiasm is ‘infectious’ i.e. it fires up the whole team to
perform better. The only difference between the successful team and any other
team, is that little bit of extra effort, which is possible only if there is an
enthusiastic approach.
Give honest and
sincere appreciation, whenever a person deserves this. This is not to be
confused with flattery, which shows up the lack of character of the Flatterer.
A Flatterer almost always has an ulterior motive behind his flattery, which is
usually only to his own benefit. However, other things being equal, it is far
better to suffer a Flatterer, than to be stuck with an ungrateful person, who
does not ever appreciate anything, much less ever praise anyone. An ungrateful
person displays a total lack of any leadership qualities.
The moment someone
points out any of your mistakes, it is better to accept it graciously, instead
of launching your own diversionary
tactics to shift the blame elsewhere, or deny something totally. However, you
must take care not to repeat the same mistake again. To make a mistake once is
human; to repeat it many times, is sheer carelessness and not pardonable.
Accept the mistakes of another, without
humiliating him publicly, and rejoice in the success of his efforts to correct
it. Congratulate the person when he corrects the mistake, with the same
constancy, as when you pointed out his mistake. You must always be fair in your
dealings.
Don’t
get unnecessarily involved in Arguments. They
achieve nothing. Neither side knows the facts. If they did, why would they
argue ? Nor are the arguers interested in knowing any facts. To an Arguer, who
is right is more important, than what is right. An argument is an emotional
affair. When viewed logically, it is a complete waste of time, as there are no
tangible benefits. Neither side is open to the point of view of the other.
There is nothing to be learnt from it either, as neither side is working
systematically. The only way to get the best out of an argument is to avoid it,
or decline to participate. Arguments leave you frustrated and emotionally
charged, without achieving any objective, of putting up your point-of-view.
In order to learn
anything new, you need an exchange of ideas. This can only be done with a
Discussion, a give-and-take of information and ideas. Discussions can often lead to arguments, if
there is more than one dominating personality involved. An argument is
basically a clash of egos, whereas a discussion remains an exchange of ideas. Nobody
is trying to promote himself here. As a result, everyone who participates in a
discussion has something to gain from it.
Avoid
gossip. This spreads Lies with amazing speed, and
can result in irreparable harm to the person concerned. You, yourself, may well
be the next victim of gossip. When you betray the trust of someone’s
confidential information, you will lose his respect forever. Gossip is the work
of idle minds. They never have the honesty or the guts to come out in the open,
with any accusation and give the person a fair chance to prove or disprove
anything. It is an unnecessary and cowardly victimisation of a person.
Don’t
just vaguely promise something. When you make it
a Commitment, you plan to do what you say, viz. you demonstrate your Integrity.
A Commitment is usually influenced by values, and not so much by a person or
object. You may make a commitment to support someone, because of his perceived
ideology. You are, however, free to drop your support, if he/she is found to be corrupt or otherwise unworthy.
Integrity is to really do, what you say. Never preach to others, what you
cannot follow yourself. A marriage, without commitment from both sides, is
ineffective, because the basic insecurity it generates, will impair its
efficient functioning.
Be
grateful for all that you are enjoying.
Be grateful to anyone who does something for you. But don’t expect gratitude,
for everything that you do. Selfless service is what actually satisfies,
not the gratitude of the person being helped. If you expect some return, than
that is business, not social service. Donate your time, and not just money, to
the service of another, if you really care for the person. The sacrifice may
involve not just your time, but also effort and involvement, the extent of
which determines the depth of your love to the people you claim to care for.
Be dependable and
loyal, to ensure that people reciprocate with the same intensity. One
dependable partner is worth more than a whole team of insincere ‘experts’.
Don’t
hold Grudges for anyone’s past mistakes.
They aren’t worth holding ! Forgive the person, but learn from the experience.
If you get cheated once, it is shame on the Cheater. If you should get cheated
again, by the same person, it is also shame on you, for allowing yourself to be
cheated. Honesty is the best policy. A Liar invariably gets tripped up by his
own lies.
Sincerity
of purpose is an admirable quality. Any person will
forgive a mistake easily, if he knows that there was sincerity of purpose.
Humility is the ability to accept praise graciously, with a simple Thank you.
This should be without either arrogance or without belittling yourself, either
of which extreme is bad. Arrogance is a sign of over-confidence, while being
unnecessarily servile indicates someone trying to hide something.
Courtesy.
This is something which many people are unwilling to grant others, but always
expect from everyone else. It costs nothing to be polite, but the effect it
has, on bringing down barriers of hostility, is remarkable. Approaching a
person with courtesy often opens doors; just as a rude or arrogant approach
blocks your path, with equal efficiency.
Always
try to maintain your sense of humor.
The ability, to look on the lighter side of things, is what keeps you going, in
times of stress. It takes less muscles to smile than to frown. The ‘too
serious’ person, who has no time to smile, generates ill-will among his team,
which affects the long term performance considerably.
Immature people
enjoy putting down their juniors (or people under their control) sarcastically,
in the misguided impression that they are cracking a joke. You should laugh
with someone, never at someone, because the ill will that you create, in the
mind of your ‘victim’, will eventually lead to your own downfall. One extra
enemy you unnecessarily create can neutralize the work of a hundred friends.
People may laugh at your ‘so called’ joke at that time, but carry away a very
poor impression of you, as a person. If he is joking about that person today,
he may well do so about you tomorrow.
Be
a true friend, in order to be a good friend.
If you value your friendship and care for the person, it is better to be
truthful, even if it seems distasteful at that time, than to risk telling lies,
to ‘keep’ a friendship. A true friend is one who shares your joys, as well as
assists you in times of trouble. The ‘fair weather’ friend is one who wants to
share the joy, but abandons you, when you are going through trouble. Actually
it is only during times of trouble, that you really need a ‘true’ friend the
most. When a friend is in trouble, don’t
give empty words like ‘Call me if you need anything’, when you mean nothing of
the kind. A person who really means to help, will start doing something to
help, no matter how small, to demonstrate the quality of his friendship.
Friendship
usually involves some sacrifice. It is the very
opposite of selfishness. There is no ‘By the way, can you do this ?’ You must go out of your way,
to help a friend, if you genuinely feel that he should come out of his
misfortunes. The friend will reciprocate the same kind of help to you, in your
time of need. A ‘fair weather’ friend is like an acquaintance, he remains as
long as he is not needed for anything ! It is just like a ‘friendship’ born out
of some ulterior motive, which never lasts, once the ‘job’ is done. A true
friendship lasts forever. Even one ‘true’ friend is better than having hundreds
of ‘fair weather’ friends, who are worthless in times of need.
Comments